Growing Older But Not Up

Jimmy Buffet lyrics aside, growing older but not up seems to be the common theme for our society lately. We are perpetually trying to look younger, act younger, be younger. Fifty year old women and seventy year old men have babies; ninety year old men pop Viagra like Chicklets; celebrities gush about plasitic surgery and Botox injections; Miley Cyrus is the epitome of tween entertainment.

All of this would be fine, except most of the adults I know (either directly or indirectly) insist upon acting like spoiled children apporximately 85 percent of the time. I know a pregnant twenty-one year old whose mother still does her laundry and butters her pancakes. I know a twenty-four year old mother of three who would rather amass hundreds of friends on facebook than pay attention to her own children (which is perhaps why they keep ending up in state custody). I know a fifty-five year old man who won't even cut his own meat - his wife cuts it for him. Approximately ten percent of my students (who are university students, remember) can't even string together a subject and a verb in order to create a complete sentence. And as the epitome of this refusal to grow up, two high school classmates of mine recently sent me nasty messages on facebook, all because I said I didn't like their kids' names (seriously girls, get over yourselves).

I understand that childhood is great and fabulous and something we should all cherish forever and always, but it's time that adults start acting like adults. We need to leave the whining and crying and tantrum-throwing to the kids and accept the fact that we have to grow up. We have to do our own laundry and make our own pancakes. We have to take care of our children. We have to cut our own food and pour our own drinks. Some people may not like us. Some people may make nasty comments about us. Sending nast e-mails and throwing fits and avoiding responsibility gets us nowhere. Acting like children only teaches our children that they'll never have to grow up or own up to their actions. That's certainly not the message that I want to send to my children.